Sunday, July 15, 2012

Hello From Annie

Poor Annie. She has grown and changed so much in the last couple of months, and it has gone largely ignored on the blog. Here is a post all her own. I know there's only one photo, but she is so stinking cute in this photo that is truly worth way more than a thousand words. Happy 5 months, Anniecakes!

Monday, July 9, 2012

There's A Body In The Bushes

If you want the Reader's Digest Condensed version of this story, just skip ahead to the movie. But you'll really get more out of it if you give me the time to paint a picture for you before viewing the dramatic reenactment of how Kevin found a dead body.

I want you to picture a windy foothill road with a lot between two houses. The lot looks like the jungle took it over years ago. Huge shrubs, a tangle of ivy and vines and oak and who knows what else. Then you notice a small opening. You approach and discover a path through the bushes, which you follow. 10 yards or so down the path, you encounter the Tiki Hut. The 15-feet-tall bird of paradise plants hang over a rickety wooden porch. If you go up all 4 steps of the stairs onto the porch and into the house you'll see windows on 3 walls, and bamboo on the ceiling and the 4th wall. This place gives a certainty that building codes were not consulted or even considered in its design.

If you spent any time there, you might come to love its quiet charms. Plenty of wild life, views of bushes, flowering vines and plants on all sides, the wind through a canopy of tall oak trees. I still long for the sound of the rare rain storm as the drops pound the windows and the thin ceiling. You might observe that the sinks and shower drain directly out the side of the house onto the ground, helping maintain this jungle-like environment, and also contributing to the sinking foundation that makes you feel a little seasick as you traverse the uneven wooden floors.

The Tiki Hut is just one of four units on the property. The elderly land lady, Virginia, lives in the big house out back. The other house is split into three "apartments". Virginia will probably tell you about her poetry the first time you meet her. She writes cat poetry; not poetry about cats, but poetry written from the perspective of the cats. She will recite it to you in a singsong voice if you ask. And maybe even if you don't ask.

Living in the adjacent "apartment" are Dave and his infirm mother. Contrary to the reenactment video, Dave is neither a fuzzy woodland creature nor an Indian chief. Instead, I want you to picture what Jesus would have been if he'd fallen in with the stoners during high school and never left. This is Dave. He has huge wild bushy hair and a full beard. He has a slightly crazed look on his face all the time and is easily excitable. He and Virginia do not get along, but their individual crazies seem to have found a coexistent balance.

We lived in the Tiki Hut for 3 years and had many adventures, but this one takes the cake. This is a fairly accurate reenactment of that fateful night, as well as a follow-up phone call from Virginia the next day.

Body In The Bushes from Krissie Cook on Vimeo.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Half a Decade

Stellan is 5 years old. I am having a hard time processing this. I mean, when I think about where I was and what I was doing around the time he was born, that seems like a really long time ago. But he himself can't possibly have been here for that long!
In an effort to convince myself that it really has been 5 years, I made Stellan a little movie, tracking him through each and every one of those 5 years. I've posted it here in case you, devoted reader, might also be interested in watching 5 trips around the sun condensed into less than 2 minutes. It's a fast 100 seconds; in fact, it might fly by almost as fast as the last 5 years.

Happy 5th Birthday, Stellan! from Krissie Cook on Vimeo.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

5,256,000 Minutes

Let's do the math:

           3 coasts
           7 homes
           4 cars
           3 kids
           3 college degrees
           5 jobs (that pay money)
         23 states visited
           4 computers
           8 cell phones
           1 well-intentioned but ill-fated hot dog diet (we did save money, though!)
           5 hand-me-down couches, futons and recliners
           1 backyard fire
           2 crazy people invading during floods
           1 dead body in the bushes
           6 supportive parents
         15 fantastic siblings
+       10.96 cutest nieces and nephews in the world
10 years of marriage to my best friend

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Monday, July 2, 2012

Gift of Tongues

Living with a two-year-old is a unique time in life. Rachelle is an excellent communicator, letting us know what she needs and wants. To the untrained ear, her language seems like gibberish; to the fluent listener, however, her words are rich in meaning. Here is a sample of some of our recent exchanges:

Literal translation: hungry
Situational translation: It's 5:05 AM on a Saturday morning and I think it's high time you were out of bed, Dad. Please get up and fetch me Breakfast #1 and then snuggle on the couch with me until Stellan gets up and usurps my spot on your lap.

Deekeen Mulk
Literal translation: Annie is nursing
Situational translation: I'm going to sit here in your lap and try to snuggle Annie out of your arms. When my cutest tricks aren't successful, I will disappear to the other side of the house. Soon you won't hear me at all. And you will worry. Rightly so, Mom.

Literal translation: froggy potty (training toilet)
Situational translation: I am so excited to potty train, Mommy! I am pretty clear on the concept, but a little fuzzy on the chronology. I have already pooped in my diaper, and I stripped it off 3 rooms ago. It may or may not have dripped a bit on the carpet, you can probably follow a trail back to the diaper. I'm now going to sit on this potty and coat it in the worst kind of filthiness until you catch up with all the rest of the mess and finally clean me up. And fwoggy too. Just as soon as Baby Annie's done deekeen mulk.

Literal translation: come on
Situational translation: You are busy with something that doesn't involve me. Please stop it now; I am going to literally drag you away for something very specific that I urgently need. I'm not sure what it is, but I'll know it when I see it.

Butt Kee
Literal translation: butt cream (diaper rash ointment)
Situational translation: No, those aren't Mickey Mouse gloves. My hands are completely coated in butt cream. As are my legs, my arms and, inexplicably, my lips. Oh, and you may want to check for butt cream in big chunks on my bedroom carpet, a few doors, your dresser, and your bed. Maybe a few other spots, too. Basically everywhere but my butt.

Literal translation: mine
Situational translation: 1. Stellan just took something from me. 2. I just took something from Stellan. 3. I'm bored and neither of us is holding anything, but it sure is fun to fight about it.

Night Night
Literal translation: good night
Situational translation: Good night. Thanks for tucking me in, I'm actually going to stay here now. All night. On the first tuck in. Because I really am a very good girl almost all the time. I'll see you tomorrow when I'm hungee.