Monday, July 2, 2012

Gift of Tongues

Living with a two-year-old is a unique time in life. Rachelle is an excellent communicator, letting us know what she needs and wants. To the untrained ear, her language seems like gibberish; to the fluent listener, however, her words are rich in meaning. Here is a sample of some of our recent exchanges:

Literal translation: hungry
Situational translation: It's 5:05 AM on a Saturday morning and I think it's high time you were out of bed, Dad. Please get up and fetch me Breakfast #1 and then snuggle on the couch with me until Stellan gets up and usurps my spot on your lap.

Deekeen Mulk
Literal translation: Annie is nursing
Situational translation: I'm going to sit here in your lap and try to snuggle Annie out of your arms. When my cutest tricks aren't successful, I will disappear to the other side of the house. Soon you won't hear me at all. And you will worry. Rightly so, Mom.

Literal translation: froggy potty (training toilet)
Situational translation: I am so excited to potty train, Mommy! I am pretty clear on the concept, but a little fuzzy on the chronology. I have already pooped in my diaper, and I stripped it off 3 rooms ago. It may or may not have dripped a bit on the carpet, you can probably follow a trail back to the diaper. I'm now going to sit on this potty and coat it in the worst kind of filthiness until you catch up with all the rest of the mess and finally clean me up. And fwoggy too. Just as soon as Baby Annie's done deekeen mulk.

Literal translation: come on
Situational translation: You are busy with something that doesn't involve me. Please stop it now; I am going to literally drag you away for something very specific that I urgently need. I'm not sure what it is, but I'll know it when I see it.

Butt Kee
Literal translation: butt cream (diaper rash ointment)
Situational translation: No, those aren't Mickey Mouse gloves. My hands are completely coated in butt cream. As are my legs, my arms and, inexplicably, my lips. Oh, and you may want to check for butt cream in big chunks on my bedroom carpet, a few doors, your dresser, and your bed. Maybe a few other spots, too. Basically everywhere but my butt.

Literal translation: mine
Situational translation: 1. Stellan just took something from me. 2. I just took something from Stellan. 3. I'm bored and neither of us is holding anything, but it sure is fun to fight about it.

Night Night
Literal translation: good night
Situational translation: Good night. Thanks for tucking me in, I'm actually going to stay here now. All night. On the first tuck in. Because I really am a very good girl almost all the time. I'll see you tomorrow when I'm hungee.


Amanda said...

To echo your sentiments: I feel like I'm reading my life in your words.

D said...

Yay! Sounds a lot like silas.

Karen said...

Krissie, you have a gift of making what you write so true to life!

Elaine Gibson said...

What fun to read. Thanks for bringing it all back. When they are young, the days are long but the years are short. Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

And hear I thought Spanish was tough. Good think I never studied Kid Speak.


Katie said...

Literal Translation: Loved this
Situational Translation: I enjoyed reading this very much. You are clever and I miss your family.

Jess said...

I love little kids!!!